Dec
12
A number of years ago, I wrote about Nicole, a friend of mine who gave up crossdressing/transitioning despite being the prettiest and most feminine t-girl I had ever met. This person decided that it was all a fraud, and he could satisfy all his needs as a beautifully feminine gay man – almost a yaoi character, if you will. (See my post Yowza Yaoi! for my take on this term, and Wikipedia for a more scholarly description.)
The reasons for his decision that the whole transgender experience for him was not authentic had to do with the way his treatment changed from one moment to the next at the hands of the same people, based solely on his gender presentation. (A wig coming off would be a relationship-changing moment, for example.) It seems their like or dislike, attraction or revulsion for him was based not on his genuine soul and personality but on the way he dressed and groomed himself and the efforts he made to transform his gender or not.
I am sure his own self-perception was similarly affected – and I say this out of personal experience.
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Dec
03
Today, I bring you a brand new photo, fresh off the presses. (Or is that, “Hot off the griddle?” … Would you believe, “Right out of the darkroom?”)
Perhaps I shouldn’t comment on my own work, but if I didn’t say stuff, you wouldn’t have a reason to visit, right? So, what the heck…
I really like this shot because it seems there is more to it than simply, “Look at the pretty girl.”
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Nov
20
Gender is the simplest thing in the world – until you (or others in your life) start questioning it. Then, there is no end of questioning, no end of wondering, of guilt, of fear, of discrimination.
Sometimes, we make the simple complicated. And sometimes, someone can find the words to cut through all the garbage and make what seems so very complicated quite simple. It all looks effortless, but we know better 😉
I commend you to this video. Watch it and share it. Simple wisdom is such a rare thing.
Nov
17
The grass may seem always to be greener on the other side, but take it from someone who’s walked a mile on both sides, it isn’t worth the gender envy.
Gender Envy by Men
Guys may think that women have it all.
After all, men are beguiled by women’s charms and desirability. And, men are driven to desire sex, while women seem to be able to have as much as they please and yet often decline to partake.
On the dating scene, men must put their egos on the line in pursuit of women, making the first move, risking rejection – and it may often seem that women have no shortage of options at their feet.
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Nov
10
Since I started up this new site, I have scarcely had enough time to put into my modeling efforts. I haven’t even managed to introduce my blog readers to the photos I have posted in the modeling section of this site from shoots I have already done.
Well, today’s the day.
This will be the first in an intermittent series on the photos in my modeling portfolio.
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Nov
07
I put nail polish on my fingernails a few days ago, and wow, what an incredible intrusion it has been in my life!
…no, not really in a bad way; more of an enlightenment really.
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Oct
29
The Saturday night before Halloween is often the best party night of the holiday, as people can stay out late and let loose.
With Halloween on Wednesday night, and people having to get up for work on Thursday, the parties do get a bit sparse after a few hours, and the incredible efforts some folks put into their costumes don’t get their full return. So, Saturday night’s the night.
I was pretty much in awe of the shindig thrown by the Subspace people (http://www.subspacelive.ca/) at a place called the Opera House. The venue was decked out professionally to look its ghoulish best, the soaring ceilings and terrific lighting system made for an amazing space, and the shows they did on stage were equally impressive.
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Oct
24
After my last two dating posts (Oops, I Did It Again – A Dating Post-Mortem and Dating and Sex – Smarter the Second Time), I want to elaborate on what may seem to many an inconsistent or schizophrenic dating approach. In fact, some may see me as teasing men and leading them on, only to slam the door in their faces.
I plead innocence. I never promise anything I won’t deliver, and I do my best to clearly set the limits, when I know what they are. To the extent I am confusing anyone, it is because I am still learning the ropes.
Anyway, there are no guarantees on a date and it is a woman’s prerogative to say no at any time. I am not playing games; rather I am trying to protect myself physically and emotionally as best I can. If I change my mind, it is because I am uncomfortable with my previous decision. It may be frustrating, but it is honest. Sorry.
I am a playful little kitten, and quite frankly, the idea of a one-night stand with a stranger is appealing, but only theoretically.
However, as a real-life thing, it is not such a good idea for three main reasons:
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Oct
20
It actually took me by surprise, my reaction to this clerk referring to me and my GF as “ladies.”
We started the day going out for coffee and pedicures, followed by a stop on our way home at Home Depot. We needed to get some answers about some work that needed to be done at our home, what was involved, whether we could do it ourselves or have to hire someone, what it all would cost, etc., etc.
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Oct
03
I am pretty hard on myself. But sometimes, the judgments I pass on myself have implications for my understanding of being a tgirl generally.
I sometimes see masculinity in myself in place of my femininity, and I recoil. I know I can fix it through an adjustment of clothing, makeup, hairstyle or attitude, and everything will be ok.
But, what if I couldn’t?
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