tgirl

a- gender clothing

What Turns on Gender?

Yeah, I’m a guy. And a gal. Why can’t I be both at once?

I have tried for quite some time now to try to conceptualize my gender identity. I have rejected many paradigms, but have yet to settle on one that feels right.

In some sense, I am both male and female. But, that makes me two people, and I’m not really, am I?

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pampering at a spa

Taking Care of Myself – Pampering is Good for the Spirit

One of the major differences between men and women is the time we spend on ourselves.

There is an incredible amount of work that goes into properly grooming oneself as a woman.

There is constant attention to detail, like carefully washing one’s face every day, exfoliating, then moisturizing the face and eyes separately. There is a regimen for the evening and another in the morning.

There is nail care, and hair care, and body hair removal by waxing or shaving or whatever. There is scraping off dead skin on hands and feet or wherever it appears.

A girl has to moisturize her whole body, get occasional facials, do masks and peels and so on.

Her hair has to be styled often, and there are myriad of products to be applied at different times for differing purposes. Frequent visits to the salon are advisable.

Then, the clothes, and the shoes…

Even going to bed, a girl has to look her best, so there’s lingerie and bathrobes and slippers…

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womanly essence

Womanly Essence

Y’know, I asked the question a few posts back on the essence of womanhood, or what it means to be a woman, but then I barely touched on the answer.

There are those who focus on body parts. Others insist that it is chromosomes that matter.

I think that on a practical basis, both miss the point.

The way I see it, a person who goes out in the world as a woman, behaves as women are known to behave, accepts the privileges and restrictions that pertain to women… that person is, for all practical purposes, a woman.

Of course, male-bodied individuals who wish to assume this role cannot conceive children, but many women-born-women cannot either.

Is there a good reason to restrict our conception of women to those with the right body parts or chromosomes? I don’t really see it.

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What I’m Talkin’ About!

I just love this video!

(And here’s a little vid behind the scenes:)

I think it’s a rotten ad for whatever they are trying to sell, but as a depiction of someone who can be either gender at the flip of a switch, it totally rocks my world!

You can see how the slightest change in posture and attitude of this transgender model turns what is obviously a beautiful woman into what is equally clearly a handsome man.

That’s the way I see it anyway. I’m sure others will say this model is either androgynous or both genders at once.

I disagree. But regardless of the paradigm, it looks to me to be a very positive depiction of the blurring line between the genders. It has to make some people sit up and take notice, perhaps open some minds as to what people can be like and how attractive it can be.

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chauvinism personified

Beyond Banacek

I enjoy the nostalgia of watching television shows that I loved way back when.

One of those was a short-lived series called Banacek, in which George Peppard played a brilliant, suave, rich, arrogantly charming insurance investigator, collecting hundreds of thousands of dollars in each episode for recovering insured items worth millions for their insurers and their hapless investigators.

I ate that stuff up as a young man. But as a not-so-young woman…

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comforting

Who’s in Charge? – The Real Janie Needs Comforting Too

As I have said previously, just being Janie is not enough. A person has to do something, be something.

Since I wrote that post, I have been busy working on creating my new site, and on opening up the possibilities of doing both modeling and photography. Other stuff is in the works.

It is not as if I had a lot of time on my hands before, but now that my girl life is taking on some real challenges and consuming more of my time and my thoughts, I have started to feel something strange.

For the first time, I have actually sought out my male side as a respite from the pressure of my female life.

I think it is quite common for guys with a female side to seek to escape the responsibilities and difficulties in their lives by turning to her. Among the many motivations I have discussed for my becoming Janie, this one was present.

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one of my roles is a blogger

Authenticity

Now that I have discussed Roles (and Multiple Roles) and Impressions – The Message of Our Presentation, it is time to go back to the questions I posed last week about being an imposter or intruder.

The other day, I found myself having to switch back and forth between my two selves.

I woke up and went to a neighborhood cafe to write my blog as Janie.

But, I knew that my lunch was going to be with family members who expected “him” and this was to be followed by a little road trip to meet some people in the evening: more Janie-business.

It is a bit of a trip switching back and forth. Here is a stream of consciousness about my day: I put on an androgynous t-shirt and light-colored feminine jeans that roll up to capris, showing off my new anklet; I went to the bathroom at the cafe in the morning an used the women’s room; while working, my hair was getting in my face, so I took out my hair clip and pinned my hair up; just before leaving for lunch, I rolled down my jeans to cover my legs, and went back to the bathroom – this time the men’s room; as I was leaving, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror which reminded my to take that hairclip out of my hair (sheesh!), at which time I decided that a manly pony-tail was more in order; I had my lunch date, and then transformed myself back to the way I looked in the morning for the drive…

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Multiple Roles

One of the things I kinda glossed over last time (Impressions – The Message of Our Presentation) were the different roles each of us plays.

A woman may be an executive during the day and a casual jeans and T (shirt) girl in the evening, or even a sexy model on weekends.

Someone meeting her in any one of her roles may not imagine the other roles she plays, and may be turned off or taken aback by some of the possibilities…

…of course, not likely to the extent they might be should they run across the woman they met with yesterday walking down the street today as a man.

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impressions

Impressions – The Message of Our Presentation

(… continued from Roles)

It occurs to me that people generally put no small amount of effort into presenting an image of themselves to the world through the way they dress about who they are and how they want to be seen and treated.

Whether it is the youngster in a t-shirt and ball-cap with his pants hanging well below his underwear or the businessman with a $2,000 suit and professionally selected shirt and tie to complement the look, each has taken a great deal of trouble to send a message about their self-image.

We all know what is likely to be the result of our presentation choices based on our understanding of social norms in society today.

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Roles

The other day, I wrote about feeling like an imposter… which begs the question, “What exactly is the pretence?”

Stated differently, “What is it about being a woman that I am doing that is not authentic?”

Of course, these questions lead into consideration of what being a woman is all about… a bit of a tough question.

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