May
06
I shouldn’t really get a kick out of confusing the poor uninitiated, but for some reason, I do.
I was in a suburban restaurant the other day, totally in guy mode, when the need arose to use the loo. Of course, I went to the men’s room.
As I was standing at the sink, washing my hands, the door (which was slightly behind me and to my left) opened and a man came forward. I turned to look and saw him stop in his tracks as he took in the sight of me, look back at the sign on the door, then back at me.
Then, he stepped back and let the door close.
A few seconds later, the door opened again, and I turned to him and said with a friendly smile, “Yes, you’re in the right place.” I paused, aware that he still wasn’t completely buying it, and reassured him, “And, so am I.”
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Feb
23
For the first time in a long time I found myself thrilled to spend a day as a guy.
I’d almost forgotten how wonderful that can be.
So much so, that when I was doing some writing a month or so ago, I had more than a little difficulty finding any reason that truly resonated inside as to why a person would want to be a guy.
But manhood can be quite a rush. A powerful feeling and a feeling of power. A feeling of strength and control and competence in a way that’s completely different from the feminine versions of those things. (This is an astounding contrast with the feelings I expressed in this post from last summer.)
If I had to find a metaphor, it would be, um… shoes. Masculine shoes and feminine shoes. Oxfords and high heels.
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Feb
09
I received a comment a ways back from a blogger who claims to have been emancipated by his escape from the habit (or addiction) of crossdressing.
His story piqued my interest because it is very different from the vast majority of what I hear out there – what most of us hear.
Truth be told, there is a lot of supportiveness out there – perhaps too much.
Don’t get me wrong; it is wonderful that we all encourage one another. But, it is good to remember that crossdressing may not be constructive for everyone who undertakes it.
Read More»Jan
25
Every day, I get people friending me on flickr, and when I go to check them out, I find that a disturbing number of them seem to have gone through a surprisingly similar routine in their self-photography.
What they seem to do is take a few pictures of themselves facing the camera, with their heads cuts off, and then they turn around and bend over for the camera.
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Oct
29
During this week, I have made a point of concentrating on the way I speak. I mentioned last time that I took a voice lesson and attended seminars at Fantasia. But, what I want to talk about now is what I am learning from myself, having spent the week focusing on my speech.
This is the first time I have not let myself off the hook in terms of communicating as a woman. In public, in private, alone or on stage, talking to others or to myself (yes, I am nuts!), I insisted from myself that I speak as a woman.
I usually let my guard down when walking on the street or sitting at home talking about stuff with GF. Not this week. If I got upset, I’d often tend to fall back into guy voice to cope; not this week. In fact, any time I found myself faltering in any way, I’d excuse myself and go to the bathroom and regroup (something that became less necessary as the week wore on).
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Oct
25
The way I see it, sometimes the simplest things are the sexiest.
You can put on a corset and collar, low-cut bustier, micro-mini skirt and fishnet stockings, spiked thigh-high boots and dramatic makeup and you’ll have something screaming sexy, no doubt.
But, in my view, that’s trying too hard. And the results are more shrill than “sexy” should be.
Sexy is a mood, a feeling… it is something sensual and deep rather than painted on superficially. Its subtlety is what makes it so powerful… it is almost an ambush the way it overwhelms its prey…
Read More»Oct
05
Annie Lennox, the gender-bending artist who came to fame as the voice (and soul) of the Eurythmics in the eighties, has recently become the sole focus of an art exhibit at the Victoria & Albert Museum in London called “The House of Annie Lennox” – a take-off on her website name – The House of Me.
She is even going to personally, physically be part of the exhibit. In what she calls “a mix between art, video and showcase,” she will do some of her work at a desk within the display, on view to spectators but not able to see them.
If you don’t know Annie Lennox, treat yourself to a quick search online for her biography. Or, just click this link: http://www.nationalpost.com/news/Diva+display/5452384/story.html
In one of the unusual anecdotes I read, she had to furnish proof that she was actually female before MTV would allow her Sweet Dreams video to air.
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Oct
01
I am bringing this up with precious little in the way of insight. Hopefully, some of you will have something to offer on the subject.
The ad below (please click on it to enlarge it to readable size) comes from a local paper and expresses concern with efforts to teach young children about sexual and gender diversity. (The title of this post comes from the name of the website responsible for this ad.)
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Sep
29
The “ Pretty Man ” experience set me thinking more and more about the idea.
If it proves possible to give voice to my feminine side without being a woman, then all the inner conflicts about whether I am two-gendered, or which gender I truly am melt away; the stigma of being trans, and the fear of discovery disappear. I go back to being one person, with one name, one wardrobe and no secrets.
The first sign of trouble, though, came the other night when I went out with friends, dressed in a tight-fitting mock turtleneck, narrow pants and somewhat feminine flats – all black.
Read More»Sep
28
Following on from the last post, I figure that as an exercise in personal evolution and introspection, I could try to give being a “pretty man” a try and see how it feels.
In some sense, it occupies a middle ground between regular guy and trans woman, so maybe I can find a way to get my mind around the concept.
As a start, I went out this past weekend to a party with friends, and then out for a late bite dressed as you see in the photo. (I did not dare put on makeup.)
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