Jul
28
“Normal” is not a welcome word in transgender circles. We are, irrefutably, relatively rare in number, and our take on gender and sexuality is probably not shared by the vast majority of folks.
While “normal” can be a statistical term, it can also be a value judgment. The opposite of “normal” in that latter sense is something like “different.”
The jump from “different” to “sick because your different” is one that many people make without a moment’s thought.
But, it behooves us to insist that people ask themselves, “Why?”
Ok, I am different than most people. Why do you care? Why do you think it is wrong? Why do you think it is sick? Think about it. And then again answer the key question: why do you care?
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Jun
12
From time to time, I am saddened by feelings of guilt over what I am putting my GF through. I have been meaning to say a word or two about it in these pages for some time, and am finally impelled to do so after having read similar sentiments on the blog of my dear friend Petra.
So guilt-ridden am I, that it seems whenever GF gets upset with me, I take it to be a sign of her patience running thin with my whole charade.
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Dec
08
(This is the first of what I hope will be more than a few guest posts written by my GF, Emily.)
I have come a long way since I first encountered Janie some four years ago. Of course, Janie has come a long way too.
Although Janie was never hidden from me, and I learned about her at the same time as Janie did herself, I still went through many of the usual trials and tribulations most women go through on learning that her spouse is a crossdresser. Flash forward to the present and I don’t really even think of Janie as a crossdresser now, but rather I think of her as a unique person with many interesting sides, and someone I‘m lucky to share my life with. The best of all worlds in many respects. We have always been the best of friends in addition to lovers, but now I have not only a spouse, a lover, and a boyfriend, but a girlfriend too!
Read More»Apr
16
Under the general heading of “Pot Calling Kettle” or “Let She Who is Without Sin…” I am putting my high-heeled foot down after seeing the abomination that is called “The Girlfriend Look.”
H&M, of which I am a loyal and enthusiastic customer, issued one of their fashion magazines a month or so ago containing the page pictured at right.
I would have thought that just seeing the photos would have been enough for most everyone to agree that this was an idea whose time will never come…
But, I was wrong, sadly.
After all, the folks at H&M did actually issue it, and I guess fashion designers will have their little laugh and women will have their revenge…
Just don’t come crying to me when you can’t find a masculine man when you want one.
Read More»Mar
29
Here I am sitting at a Starbucks, waiting for a brand new friend to arrive from out of town.
When I say “brand new,” I mean that I’ve never met her, but I have corresponded with her at great length online, and our rapport has been a kind of sexy and smart, whirling and twirling dance of magical comet dust in the sky among the stars. Over time, our words have intermingled and procreated, producing fairy tales and flouncy flirting that have delighted and intoxicated us both.
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Aug
31
Y’know, I have always been one to want to keep my male and female sides separate. There is much to discuss on the merits or demerits of mixing genders – feminine masculinity and masculine femininity – but I’ll leave those for another time.
Right now, I am talking about my personal efforts to be a real guy when I’m a guy, and a real gal when I’m Jane. This requires, for me, a change not only of clothing but mindset, and so, I prefer to be Janie in as large blocks of time as life will permit, and my male self likewise in big chunks of time.
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Aug
06
“I’m beginning to wonder whether all of the things I love about you are Janie!”
That’s what my girlfriend said to me today. I don’t know whether to be insulted on behalf of the guy who’s been in this relationship for a very long time, or happy that she loves my girl side.
There was a time when she adamantly exclaimed her love for my arrogance, my strength and the hair on my face. But it seems she has been secretly having an affair with a much sweeter, smoother character who speaks in quieter tones, understands her feelings, helps her shop and likes to cuddle. How’s a guy supposed to compete with that?
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Jul
23
A fellow blogger recently asked her audience for ideas on how to tell her fiancée about her crossdressing. The sense I got from the post was that she was looking forward to her fiancée’s absence – going away to school – because it would allow more dressing opportunities. They have been together for years and this “hobby” as she calls it was still a secret between them.
As I mentioned in my comment on her blog, my answer was longer than her post and would be better suited to being a blog post of my own. So here I am. And this is the advice I would give her:
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