Continuing my story from last night, our lesbian friend did manage to propose to her belle, and near as I could tell, the answer was yes. I say this because champagne was offered around and I saw them hugging. But she still didn’t seem satisfied for some reason…

She also was still perplexed by my existence and so was her fiancée. “You’re straight, right?” asked the lesbian fiancée.

“Well,” I said, “that depends on what you mean by being straight.”

“I mean, you’ve never slept with a man,” she replied, without the slightest hesitation or awareness of how odd it was to be saying such a thing to a woman… or the slightest consideration or empathy for how that might make someone who is trying to be a woman feel.

I’m not the type to let poor manners bother me generally, but I did find it a bit rich that this lesbian, who craves and demands acceptance for who and what she is, should so brazenly disregard my appearance and treat me as she would any regular man.

“Yup, straight then,” I answered, much to her chagrin. But I knew where she was going with this, so, after a pause, I fed her some ammunition just for fun. “But, as a straight woman, I can’t help thinking about what it would be like…”

I’m a bit of a devil, and I was toying with her; she jumped in with both feet. She went over to my GF to discuss my homosexual tendencies with her, hoping to protect her from her lying, cheating, dishonest man – aren’t all men just beneath contempt?

It was delicious.

“You’re straight, right?

“Yes.”

“But he wants to sleep with a man!” came the epic revelation (and notice the pronoun again, BTW).

“That’s what straight girls do.” GF deadpanned, setting her straight on my gender in the process.

“Doesn’t it bother you?”

“Hell no! You gotta have variety, and I have everything, man and woman. Think of all the possibilities!” And then, the tables turned, “It’s much better than being a lesbian. No variety at all. You’re a woman, she’s a woman… everything’s the same…”

Sometimes it pays to be a devil…