Nov
24
I believe that Thanksgiving is a wonderful holiday, and, more to the point, a wonderful philosophy. It seems to me that the happiest people make thanks-giving a daily way of life.
We should never take for granted the things that we have, even if there is so much more that we may want. Nothing is ever achieved alone, so there is always someone to thank, or failing all else, just thank your lucky stars.
Food in our mouths, health in our bodies, peace in our part of the world, maybe a little love in our lives – just to name a few things – these are essential features of our lives that we just assume will be there for us.
That’s awfully presumptuous.
Read More»Nov
23
Picked up a morning coffee at Stumptown Roasters (yet another terrific NYC cafe!) before heading to Penn Station to catch a train to Philadelphia cheesesteaks!
Oh, yes. I do follow my stomach (unless there are more tantalizing temptations to distract me. 😉 )
So, there we are, having boarded the train with our two large valises, when GF gives me “the look.” Yes, dear, I know…
Suddenly, it is this girl’s duty to heave those suitcases onto the overhead rack – and from the stares that came my way, I was either being perceived as an incredibly able-bodied woman or, well, you know…
Nov
19
I was searching online last night for a bar or nightlife in Manhattan that welcomed t-girls, and came across an interesting, but I guess not altogether surprising, phenomenon:
There is pretty well no way to search for anything tgirl without getting utterly mucked up and mired in pornography and prostitution. The search engines have so much of that crap tied to tgirl, or any synonym, that a search is pretty much useless.
The same, incidentally, is true of blogs.
The vast majority of so-called tgirl blogs are simply ads for porn sites.
Is this an indication of something wrong with us? Or what?
Nov
09
Last time, I spoke of practicality (horrors!) in terms of feminine footwear, and related it to passability. This is a bit of an addendum to that post.
While part of me wants to be as authentic a woman as possible, another part recognizes that tgirls are, by definition, exceptional women – exceptionally good, bad or just different, we are not the same.
I have often made a point of saying how much I feel that being a tgirl is being a special, wonderful, rare creature.
So, I am well aware that simply striving to be a woman like every other is not always the goal.
I am not entirely without sympathy for the concept that guides some of us, that many GGs have come to take their femininity for granted and have dropped the ball.
We may want to pursue that so-called lost art of femininity, but even then, if it is to have any effect outside of the individuals doing it, it is still an evolution, not a revolution.
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Nov
05
Ok, maybe a bit melodramatic… maybe saved my feet is more like it.
But, I have never had a love-type relationship with flats. I think that women – and especially tgirls – look much better in heels.
The tgirl as
pect is important. Men tend to have larger feet and proportionately shorter legs than women, and heels address both concerns. A bent foot is a smaller foot, and obviously a heel extends the length of the leg.
But, (I can’t believe I am saying this!!) there is a practical aspect to life as a woman. GF will be relentless after hearing me say such a thing, but alas, it is true.
Until now, I have adopted the approach of taking along a pair of running shoes and wearing them on the treks from place to place, then changing into heels where people might see me.
But, aside from being inconvenient and forcing me to have a larger purse at certain times when when I might much prefer having that really cute small one, stuff happens while you’re on the way from A to B.
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Nov
03
Coming across as a woman involves communicating as one – and that’s a much broader concept than one’s actual voice.
Far from the direct and monotone, goal-oriented communication that men use, female speech is differently motivated and but one part of a much more complex form of communication.
To effect a feminine voice, you want to have an acceptable pitch – which is what most of us focus upon. But, there are plenty of women with low voices who are never mistaken for men. So dwell on that for a moment.
Read More»Nov
01
I gave the issues I last wrote about some more thought, and have a few ideas to share.
For me, being female is a joyous and intense state. I am sociable, flirty and “on.” Being a guy is more of a contented and relaxed, comfortable thing. Appropriate adjectives include strong, aware, capable.
Being Janie is still quite stressful for me – not so much about being discovered, or worrying about danger any more, but more about doing things that are outside my comfort zone.
I still have so much to remember to do (and not do) when being a woman, from voice to manner to posture – things that are not yet completely innate to me.
And then, socializing is not something that comes easily to me. Though I have revelled in the friendships and interactions that I have achieved as Janie, meeting people has never been without stress for me.
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Oct
30
I hate to rain on the parade of the “I told you so”’s out there, but my wonder and joy at feeling so feminine while spending a solid week living as a woman has given way to an equal and opposite masculine feeling.
Since I have been back, I have had to be in a male mindset non-stop for almost a week, managing construction and landscaping issues and other business matters. (Don’t ask!)
After all that solid guy time, my intention to switch to girly mode today for a Halloween Party tonight and tomorrow night has met with no small amount of internal resistance.
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Oct
29
During this week, I have made a point of concentrating on the way I speak. I mentioned last time that I took a voice lesson and attended seminars at Fantasia. But, what I want to talk about now is what I am learning from myself, having spent the week focusing on my speech.
This is the first time I have not let myself off the hook in terms of communicating as a woman. In public, in private, alone or on stage, talking to others or to myself (yes, I am nuts!), I insisted from myself that I speak as a woman.
I usually let my guard down when walking on the street or sitting at home talking about stuff with GF. Not this week. If I got upset, I’d often tend to fall back into guy voice to cope; not this week. In fact, any time I found myself faltering in any way, I’d excuse myself and go to the bathroom and regroup (something that became less necessary as the week wore on).
Read More»Oct
28
This Fantasia Fair had a surprisingly intense focus on voice. Three speech pathologists were in attendance, and 4 seminars on offer, as well as private sessions available.
I took full advantage.
My personal assessment of my female voice is that it is not bad, but could stand improvement. I wanted a professional assessment, as well as some tools to use in order to better myself.
So, I met privately with one of the professionals.
The session began with her engaging me in conversation about myself and my interests, while, unbeknownst to me, a spectrometer was measuring my voice.
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