01
2011The Ups and Downs of Switching Genders
I gave the issues I last wrote about some more thought, and have a few ideas to share.
For me, being female is a joyous and intense state. I am sociable, flirty and “on.” Being a guy is more of a contented and relaxed, comfortable thing. Appropriate adjectives include strong, aware, capable.
Being Janie is still quite stressful for me – not so much about being discovered, or worrying about danger any more, but more about doing things that are outside my comfort zone.
I still have so much to remember to do (and not do) when being a woman, from voice to manner to posture – things that are not yet completely innate to me.
And then, socializing is not something that comes easily to me. Though I have revelled in the friendships and interactions that I have achieved as Janie, meeting people has never been without stress for me.
I am so much more a social creature in my feminine guise, and getting out and partying and enjoying the company of others tends to acquire a certain momentum if I keep at it consistently.
However, once I stop and go back to my comfort zone, inertia takes over.
…and that can be hard to overcome…
But, when I have had the benefit of perspective instead of being caught up in the moment of how I feel, my sense is that I have grown increasingly dissatisfied with the confines of my comfort zone as I have gotten older – and Janie’s emergence was part of that. There is always the potential for backsliding, or conversely, for my male self to displace the female by finding his own excitement, but my best guess at this moment is that I will walk my road to happiness and fulfillment in sexy heels and hose.
Of course, forecast is subject to change…
Fiona Alexis
I can relate to all of that. I’m positively socially awkward as a guy and I don’t enjoy the ‘mateship’ thing but I do feel fairly comfortable as a guy.
On the other hand, in female mode while I am outside my comfort zone and I struggle to do all the right femme things consistently, I do feel quite a certain exhiliration and excitement. But I don’t worry so much about whether I pass all the time, I’m more content being recognised as transgendered.
Fiona xx
Shirley Corning
Hi Janie,
Hun, I feel a bit silly because I understand what your saying but don’t relate at all. When I’m out as Shirley I’m as comfortable as can be, an outgoing, friendly, gregarious, precocious and fun loving girl, all girl, all Shirley as if I didn’t have a care in the world and as if Gordon didn’t exist. As Shirley I’m in my comfort zone naturally like a duck takes to water and there’s nothing outside it. So thank you for mentioning it because you’ve made me appreciate how I feel more.
You get a big warm hug,
Shirley
cdjanie
Hi Shirley,
You should appreciate it. One of the things that gets me to doubting my true femininity is how much I have to learn or remember. But, I am, after all, not at all feminine as a guy, and I have been used to behaving that way for a very long time, so I cut myself some slack there.
Hugs back, sweetie
Janie
shantown
Okay, so now I think we may have been separated at birth. I felt like you were writing about me here..I know what you mean!
Cyrsti
Just another view, but I slowly but surely lost all interest in being a social male. In my life I did have a few male friends but mostly acquaintances. I learned to “act” the macho role quite well but found I enjoyed the feminine role more and surprisingly found it wasn’t an act like the macho one.
It is amazing how different and similar the gender roads we follow!
cyrsti
AnnaRosa
I think that I am beginning to understand this and I appreciate your all tolerating my ignorance. You see, “we” you all, and I are coming from different places. It sounds like to me that what you are all talking about is GENDER. IE all those social affectations and “roles”, modes of behavior, dress, etc associated with being male or female.
My issue was always about my physical SEX….my genitals…ALL WRONG. The differences seem quite obvious to me. Given that we are so obviously different it seems silly to try and insist that we are all the same.
Thank you all for allowing me to gain some perspective.
Anne
Shirley Corning
Well Anne I’d say your quite right. We weren’t talking about gender dysphoria and were focused on gender role. We’re also quite different and coming from different places, absolutely unique in fact both physically and mentally and so are the other 7 billion inhabitants of this planet. Despite the uniqueness of every individual mankind never seems to tire of grouping people together in catagories or types by whatever they might have in common. Now you put us in the same group or catagory when you said, “”we” you all” but I object to that and resent it. The difference between you and “we” isn’t black and white. It’s infinite shades of gray and color. Your making some kind of assumption when you do that but what is it? Let me guess. Perhaps “we” are all just cross dressers, silly boys just dabbling in the feminine, playing dress up and pretend, while you are a real woman who had the misfortune of being born with a male body. I believe what you say about yourself without a doubt but to assume none of us could have anything in common with you or even be close is just that, an assumption. You can’t know that without the ability to read minds.
If I was given a magic lamp and the genie came out willing and able to grant me any 3 wishes my first wish without a doubt, hesitation or a second thought would be to have the body of a complete genetically correct woman. Would you do the same? If yes then we have something in common. I’d have to think about what I’d do with the other two wishes.
I’ve had major changes in perspective from time to time. One made me wish I was dead.
Back to you all,
Shirley
AnnaRosa
Sure making lots of assumptions there, shirly. many more than I care to enumerate, and most of them …wrong.
Shirley Corning
FYI: Thanks for nothing Anne but did you happen to notice that no one else had a word to say after your condescending comment? Could they have been offended too or do they simply know from past experience the futility of trying to object or discuss sex and gender related issues with a transsexual? I guess I’m just tired of know it all holier than thou attitudes, especially TS BS. It’s not welcome or appreciated. I don’t think I’m going to put up with it anymore but I’ve learned a VERY good lesson from you! Don’t argue, just blast them! If they get stung enough times maybe they’ll get the idea. There is hope. Thank you Anne. I feel so much better now.
Ta ta,
Shirley
AnnaRosa
Gee Shirley. Thanks for your open-minded, “inclusive” slap down. How very welcoming of you. I can see that you have not “pre-judged” my intent and stand ready to engage in open-minded, constructive dialogue.
I also see that you stand ready to decide for the others here that they have no interest in what I might have to offer in terms of an alternative perspective, since you have decided in your wisdom that I have nothing to offer snce it might not agree with your complete understanding of well…EVERYTHING.
To bad, I had hoped to explore further some possible commonalities, but I guess that possibility no longer exists, since you in your wisdom have already determined….well, again….EVERYTHING!
OK I will leave you to revel in your “wisdom”.
@ CDJanie….perhaps another time, another place. *sigh*
Shirley Corning
No, I don’t think for a minute that I know it all or am the wisest of the wise and I’m certainly not right about everything. I said some things I believe to be true but not unquestionably so. Anything I said about what you might be thinking or your intension or attitude is speculation. I don’t know what you think until you tell me and you haven’t thus far. So just after your initial comment I throw my thoughts out there and you say, “many more than I care to enumerate” as your reason to say nothing. Now you say, “I had hoped to explore further some possible commonalities.” Really? Then please go ahead. I’m all ears and have been waiting for you to say what you think. Ok. So if I went off on you for nothing and was totally mistaken about what your attitude towards other T types might be say so and I’ll apologize for my mistake. Considering your last comment then makes us both wrong about each other. How about a truce? Exchanging fire is not productive. Have to give it up for tonight anyway.
Sweet dreams all,
Shirley
AnnaRosa
@CDJanie…I did want to address one highly relavent point which you, as well as many of your…ah, “sisters” have raised as well. That being that ‘high’, or feeling of well being associated with your x-dressing or “en femme” state.
It is this ‘high’ or feeling of well being tht is so insideously pernicious in that it is also associated with a freedom from, or escape from that drab, male reality.
Consider how addictive that might be. Therein lies the slippery slope which is just exacerbated by the addition of testosterone suppressing hormones. The chemistry exceeds my level of expertise but it is fairly straight forward and well documented.
Once gone down that exceedingly inticing “primose path”, the consequences can in fact be life threatening. Again, a sadly well documented phenomenon. Not to be taken lightly. Very, VERY difficult to “undo”.
cdjanie
Annie, thanks for the caveat. I know nothing but my own experiences, but it seems to me that the feminine “high” you speak of only exists if the femininity rings true within. I doubt everyday male life is more “drab” than the female (in spite of the acronym) and therefore not given to an addictive escape from one to the other. And, in my case, no hormones are involved, so that can’t be it either.
That said, I would like to know more. If you could direct me to where I might find some of these well-documented cases, I might be able to form a more educated opinion.
AnnaRosa
The thing about HRT is that these are extemephysical morphologyly powerful chemicals that will in fact alter your brain chemistry as well as your physical morphology.
The danger lies for those that seek those physical changes without considering the changes wrought by those accompanying changes in brain chemistry.
I mean if you are happy being a “trans-woman” then no doubt these drugs will do the trick. Just be aware that ours is a sexually dimorphorous society. That you and your pals do not see it that way, does not mean that the rest of the world does.
Essentially what you will be doing is chemically castrating yourself and then living the ROLE of woman while retaining the physical morphology of a man. It can be done and has been done and is being done everyday. I am only suggesting that you consider the actual consequences of such actions.
cdjanie
Annie, I think you have hit upon something. You said, “ours is a sexually dimorphorous society.” Society is what it is, but does change as we gain knowledge, acceptance and tolerance. I doubt most of society would consider a TS to be a full-fledged woman, even today. But, we’re working on it. Why not work on expanding the concept of gender duality as well?
Transsexuals know better than most that it is possible for a person to be composed of more than one gender at the same time; you were once that way. It so happens that the dual-gender condition of a TS is problematic for them and something that must be rectified. But, for others, (perhaps like me), this condition may present somewhat differently and might just “work!” It is a politically inconvenient truth for TSs, but I’d think, after enduring all they have from society, doing what’s right would be more important to them.
cdjanie
I guess it’s my turn.
I have been discussing moving back and forth between my male side and my female side. I cherish both of my genders, and that makes me different from people like Annie, who are entirely female, and want no part of any maleness they were given, to the point of excising it surgically and hormonally.
I have seen that point made by transsexuals in condescending, misandrous and vitriolic ways that I have not cared for. And, I really wish it would stop.
We should be the very best of friends.
Like Shirley said, we are infinite shades of gray and color. For my part, I bridle at being considered simply a man; I am both male and female; I am trans (or bi-gendered or whatever), and happily so. (It is not just an affectation, or superficial, but part of my nature.) I would not take Shirley’s bargain from her genie; my wish would always be to be able to switch genders, back and forth, at the snap of my fingers.
We all want a world that accepts us as we are. We could start by accepting each other as we are.
AnnaRosa
I think you are making a serious conflation here, and I am not sure that it is intentional, but I do see it as a problem and so I will try to explain WHY I see i as a problem.
You, and your friends of similar ilk make constant reference to yourselves as “female” or your “female side”. I think what s being “missed” or avoided, is that you are not female bodied. You are male bodied. You are in possession of both the primary and secondary sexual characteristics of the MALE SEX, not the FEMALE SEX.
This is a MAJOR distinction. While your psyche might be totally feminine in inclination, the fact that you are in possession of ” a perfectly good, (male) organ” precludes the reality of your being actually female.
Now, I am well aware that there are those who will argue that a surgically created vagina is not “the same as” or “as good as” a “natural one”. I can assure you that that particular pov would be subject to very vigorous dispute by those who have actually experienced one.
Frankly, being somewhat “old fashioned” I see this as a major distinction and NOT subject to your “infinate shades of grey”. As I read your writtings and those of many subscribing to the TG meme or “umbrella”, I am stuck by your reference to G E N D E R and gender specific roles, behaviors or clothing styles.
Understand that I have LIVED, LOVED, WORKED and engaged in hetero-sexual congress on a frequent and regular basis for the past 40 years. This is WAAAYYYY different from being “bi-gendered” or two spirited. NOT “better than”…just different.
You see this is a common misapprehension…”Transsexuals know better than most that it is possible for a person to be composed of more than one gender at the same time; you were once that way. It so happens that the dual-gender condition of a TS is problematic for them…”
Simply put, this is simply WRONG, as in UNTRUE. I was NEVER, “composed of more than one gender at the same time”. I was NEVER, “that way”. MY problem was NOT being “dual-gendered”. My problem was my SEX…that “perfectly good organ”…WAS ALL WRONG!
Can you see the difference? Mine was not a “gender” problem. It was a physical one.
cdjanie
Anne, I appreciate the distinction you are drawing, but there are certain inconsistencies that give me trouble. If you can clear them up, that would be great.
First, if I understand correctly, you allow that I might be totally feminine in my psyche, but that it is my physical gender characteristics that determine my gender. I thought it was a fundamental tenet of transsexualism that it was the other way around, that it was what was between your ears not your legs that determined your true gender.
Second, if your physical gender determines gender, why does that start and end with the penis and vagina? What about the uterus, for example? I would never say that you are not female because your body is still male to the extent it doesn’t have a uterus; and yet it would seem you are less generous in that you feel free to insist that I cannot be female, even in part, because I have no vagina.
Third, I have not yet been convinced of the error in my comment that you were once composed of more than one gender at the same time. The way I understand things, it is precisely because your gender is determined both by your psyche and your physicality that you had an abiding need to make the two consistent. Otherwise, what would have been so bad about keeping the little guy?
Fourth, following from above, if, in fact, one or the other could be said to be the sole determinant of your gender, it would have to be your psyche, which was female, and overruled your physicality. If having a penis were determinant of being male, you’d rather have gone to counseling and remained male. Not wanting that organ is all about your psyche. So, it stands to reason that a female psyche such as mine makes me, to some extent, female. Not wholly female, but partially so (because my psyche is only partially female and partially male – and to be clear, not mixed but separate – which makes me different from effeminate males and such), . Your female psyche makes you entirely female. (Note that if you accept that one’s psyche is wholly determinant of their gender, two conclusions follow: first, you were never dual-gendered, and second, I can be at least partly female regardless of my physical state.)
While I have the benefit of your expertise and point of view, I would like also to ask why you seem to care so much whether I claim to be partly female or not. I have stated over and again that I am no transsexual, I am not a female, which you are. Why should it bother you that I claim to be partly female, which I believe myself to be? What possible difference can that make to you?
Thanks for your input thus far, Annie.
AnnaRosa
You continue to conflate GENDER with SEX. Until we can agree that these are two distinct NOUNS, one being what is between your ears and the other between your legs, are in fact DIFFERENT, we will remain in a circular argument.
The truth is that I do NOT care how you see yourself or how you “identify” or whatever. However what will not change no matter the the word games games or convoluted ‘logic” is that what is between your legs determines your SEX.
You can “TRANS-gender all over the place. Your sex is that reality between your legs.
These “transsexual tenets”, as you call them are just straw arguments that “you”, (the TG) have created to be knocked down. Trans-sexualism describes a state of being, or a process one goes through while one’s body, one’s sexual morphology, TRANS-forms from male to female. My psyche has always been female.
Like I said in my intial statement, you and (apparently), most of your cross-dressing and TG friends are speaking/blogging about/ describing/discussing GENDER. Even in your primary argument/discourse you seem to avoid the term, SEX….” I might be totally feminine in my psyche, but that it is my physical gender characteristics that determine my gender”
In truth, as a matter of REALITY/FACT…the correct statement would be…” I might be totally feminine in my psyche, but that it is my physical SEX characteristics that determine my gender”. And frankly, I am not sure that I can agee with that. That is just YOUR thesis and certainly open to debate, because you have yet to define SEX as opposed to GENDER. THEY ARE NOT THE SAME THING.
I guess what I am trying to say is that a penis or vagina are primary sexual characteristics, much like gonads. A castrated man is still a man, just as a woman who has suffered the loss of her ovaries is still a woman because they each still retain their primary characteristics.
That your psyche is feminine while your morphology remains male would IMO describe/define you as transgender, since you have crossed over to the other gender, while your sexual characteristics remain unchanged.
Changing your primary sexual characteristics would make/define/characterize/describe you as transsexual. Although I see myself/(“identify”), as just a woman, strictly speaking I could be described/characterized/defined as a “post-transsexual woman”, having survived the process many decades ago….as in “history”.
Shirley Corning
Both what you and Anne said on these most recent posts is very interesting. I’ve been working on some text to post this evening but I’m sick and have run out of gas. Have to finish later.
Sweet dreams,
Shirley
Shirley Corning
The conversation has turned in the direction I was going to go. Janie made some interesting points and questions but I particularly agree with the idea that the psyche had to be the determining factor but I will put it in different words. I believe it’s mind over matter and not the other way around. The mind rules and trumps the physical. So I’m going to start off with one fact I wouldn’t think anyone in their right mind would question. We live in a physical world and that world and the entire universe around it are governed by physical laws that never vary. Gravity is a good example. It always works the same and hasn’t changed that we know of in about 13.5 billion years.
Now the mind on the other hand is something else. What we think or imagine is not limited by physical laws or physical matter not even your physical sex. You can imagine yourself at the edge of the universe or the heart of an atom in the blink of an eye, things impossible in the physical world. Ok. So we get what we get when it comes to physical bodies and the mind thinks whatever it thinks. I don’t doubt Anne when she says, “My psyche has always been female.” because I’ve personally known and been friends with people like her and read up on the subject. As she said she also never had a gender identity problem. She only had a problem with her physical sex. Janie has no problem with her physical sex and I’m a wanna be who’ll carry it to my grave. We both have masculine and feminine gender identities. Also note I’m not using the word gender in reference to the physical sex of a body because gender is a word also used in reference to masculine and feminine attributes, gender role and gender identity which can make the word by itself confusing. I think you could have made what you were saying Anne clearer if you qualified gender but this is not grade school. We get it.
Your body of course is yours to control, your slave, your tool, life support and vehicle, normally functioning quite well with sufficient maintenance but it makes no decisions on it’s own. If you took out all of the brain except for the parts that keep your heart beating, lungs breathing, etc. all you would have left is a living rag doll, a vegetable as some would call it. Regardless of whether that body’s physical sex is male, female, inter sex or modified it is still just a physical body operating in a physical world. It doesn’t matter what the physical condition of your body is when it comes to the mind. It can do anything it can imagine or grasp. Multiple identities are no problem for the mind. Look at split personalities or the insane who think they are someone or something they’re not. It doesn’t have to have anything to do with reality. Look at actors. They are given a role to play and some lines to say. They read the script and imagine how the character they’re supposed to play would behave, the gestures, the looks, the tone of voice. When the show’s over they switch back to themselves but the character they played is not forgotten and they can switch back to that character at the drop of a hat. Now when does it stop being an act and becomes a sincere expression of your own. When your not acting. Creating another identity is easy. Pick any name and start to imagine what this person would be like then continue to refine and define that character the rest of your life. Gee, just like real life. I didn’t exist until my incredulous eyes saw the woman in the mirror was me. That’s when I picked a name for her and in effect when Shirley was born. I’ve been refining and defining her ever since. Anyone trying to tell me Shirley is not a real woman in my own mind or invalid or pretend because of my physical sex doesn’t know what they’re talking about. YOU… CAN’T… KNOW… THAT!!! What if someone tried to tell you that Anne because your not genetically complete? We can communicate as the language permits but we can’t do a Vulcan mind meld. There’s no way for anyone to know exactly how I feel or what it’s really like to be me. To that extent we are all islands where no one can visit or look around except perhaps God. There is no contest to see who can be the most feminine or womanly. It doesn’t matter. Now I’ve sometimes joked that I’m a professional man and an amateur woman but there is some truth to that. In some respects as a woman I’m not much more mature than an adolescent girl or teenager and in other respects I’m quite mature. Again it doesn’t matter and doesn’t change anything. Unless it directly affects me what anyone else is thinking or doing is irrelevant. Debbie can do Dallas and that changes nothing for me. Anne has said herself that she is a mature experienced woman in I presume every possible regard but so what? So are millions of other women. If I remain a virgin the rest of my life that’s my choice and it doesn’t matter or change a thing. If you could drop my brain into a female body I’d hit the ground running and good to go. How could I do that if Shirley didn’t exist? As a man in that position shouldn’t I be lost or upset? The world is full of women who we can safely say are more of a woman than I am but that doesn’t make me any less of one. I’m just one of those rare birdies you could call an almost transsexual.
In conclusion then I say the mind rules and trumps the physical. We wouldn’t have any transsexuals if that weren’t true. No one’s denying their physical sex but that doesn’t limit the mind. We’re all proof of that. A gender identity can be as real and valid as anyone else’s even if it doesn’t match the physical sex.
It makes me smile when I think of my dear old dad tinkering in his garage. He could build anything from the ground up. Occasionally he would make a remark to himself I’d overhear. My favorite was, “God I’m smart!” and it would roll me out the door. It may be hard to be humble especially when you get better looking each day but I do try. ; )
Just as a side note it’s kind of interesting if you try to graph all the T types on a transgendered scale. Imagine a graph where the Y vertical axis is the number of people and the X horizontal axis is a transgendered scale from zero to 10. The number of people is straight forward but trying to grade people on a transgendered scale is hardly a fine science. Is it how feminine they are or how much they think like women or how much they are like women? Although it may be only a little more accurate than throwing darts you decide how valid it is. Bear with me then as I draw this picture. At the low end of the transgendered scale say somewhere between zero and 4 we could probably place the fetishist, most drag queens and female impersonators. There could be exceptions of course. From 4 to about 7 or so we have the vast majority of T types, over 90%, the cross dressers. Some I’ve met frankly state they don’t have much of a feminine side and act like men in dresses. The categories are somewhat blurred but let’s try to put everyone with a feminine gender identity and personality at 7 or so and above. Let’s say the transsexuals are from 9.6 to 10. Just below that in a very small group are those who choose to live full time as women but do not transition say from 9.3 to 9.5. It was particularly amusing when Kimberly, one of the two non transitioning full timers I new, got a $5.00 sex change courtesy of the California DMV. She only went in to renew her license but the clerk looked at her then the license and said, “What a silly mistake. I’ll fix that right now.” and changed her sex from male to female. I’d give myself about 8.9. Close but no cigar. When it comes to living full time as a woman I’m so cross dressed all the time I’m practically there. So we end up with a bell curve with a big hump in the middle that narrows down to almost no one just before we get to the transsexuals who out number the almost’s at least 10 to 1. Where am I getting my figures? From renown researchers I’ve personally met who have studied T types for decades and written books about them. Dr. Richard F. Docter of Cal State Northridge. I have his book “Transvestites and Transsexuals: Toward a Theory of Cross-Gender Behavior (Perspectives in Sexuality)” and have read it. Vern and Bonnie Bollough who wrote “Cross Dressing, Sex, and Gender”. I’m not an expert but I’m not ignorant either. Docter divided transsexuals into two groups, primary transsexuals who know from early childhood they’ve got the wrong body and secondary transsexuals who come to that conclusion usually about midlife. I know I left out a type or two but I’m not going to worry about that. They’d fall in somewhere. So we got a lot of people out there thinking and doing their own thing, no big deal or surprise, just an overview. The closest thing I have to a known statistic is that all T types combined represent about 1 in a 100 men and transsexuals may be 1 out of 5000 or more.
Have I set a record for the longest post?
Peace, love and happiness ladies,
Shirley xox
AnnaRosa
You see, we now have a basis fom which to move forward. You enjoy/desire the ability to change GENDERS at will. You would like “acceptance” for that. Personally, I have no problem with that whatsover.
“I cherish both of my genders, and that makes me different from people like Annie, who are entirely female…” ~CDJanie
See…How hard was that? Given that we ARE indeed admittedly different, it is not difficult to extrapolate from that the fact that our needs and desires are also different. You enjoy “both genders” and the ability to switch back and forth. Like you say…fun and games on “Planet Transgender”. I, on the other hand, enjoy and am perfectly happy living within the gender norms associated with my sex. Again, simple differences, but significant ones.
So to my original comment about your considering the ingestion of female hormones. I see that as an extremely dangerous behavior. I am hoping that you are aware of just how powerful and life changing these chemicals are.
AnnaRosa
I blogged on this back in late March/April. This is the first post…http://anna-es-asi.blogspot.com/2011/04/between-torment-and-happiness.html
There were two subsequent posts as well as the accompanyig comments which were also quite interesting.
cdjanie
Annie, I appreciate your concern, but why do you think I am about to take hormones?
AnnaRosa
I thought that you said that you were considering doing just that.
Shirley Corning
Pass me a piece of humble pie please. When I make a mistake I admit it and resolve not to do it again. I went off like a land mine just on suspicion. So I apologize to you Anne and the rest here. I’ve put away my crusader armor and sword now.
I can certainly relate the “high” you mentioned Anne and how incredibly addicting it is. I’m pretty sure we all have breathing in common but beyond that there seems to be no end to the variety. It’s fascinating to me. So here’s Janie who loves expressing both a masculine and feminine identity. It does look like that fits the definition of bigender or Two-Spirit to me. Those are the closest definitions I’ve found for myself and like Janie I have two identities complete with their own personalities and behavior. Unlike Janie having a male body and life in the masculine role does nothing for me. I don’t hate it but I don’t like it either. I’d much rather have the body of a woman and stay in the feminine role forever. It comes so natural to me and I am so comfortable in it. I think I would’ve been much better off being born with a female body. Is that anywhere near true for you Anne? So I’m gender dysphoric as in very but how far am I willing to go to transition? Not very far. I took a serious look at SRS and taking hormones but the effects you spoke of Anne and how drastic it would all be was too much for me. Now it may seem insanely perfectionist but both options weren’t good enough for me either. It was a complete woman’s body or nothing. Sure that would take Devine intervention or alien technology neither of which is going to happen but that’s my point of view. Besides that SRS meant the pointless removal of a perfectly good organ in my case. The farthest I’ve gone to physically transition is the removal of my beard and most of the unwanted body hair by electrolysis. Oh that hurt especially right under the nose. Guess I’m different alright.
Does anyone know of anyone else like me who’s a bigender or Two-Spirit, gender dysphoric and unwilling to transition? If so I’d like to get in touch with them. I felt alone when I figured it out because out of the hundreds of T types I’ve met or made contact with there wasn’t one I knew was like me. Maybe there was but they never said so. Just by luck I found one here and we have been good friends ever since. Just to frost the cake my masculine side is straight and my feminine side bisexual. Beam me up Scotty. I’d like to leave the planet now.
So what do we have in common? Doing blogs? Wearing women’s clothes? Fitting into broad catagories? Doesn’t seem too signifigcant. I wish I could give you a magic wand Janie to physically switch back and forth and maybe see a few pictures. You could have it because I’d only use it once.
Well my dears do carry on. I’m going back into my technological cave.
Sweet dreams,
Shirley
cdjanie
Shirley, darling, we are very much alike, you and I (though obviously not the same). We both seem to have two spirits, we are both straight males and bi females. We are also both thoughtful and sensitive people.
Is that significant? I think so, but it is admittedly limited. Fact is, I am sure we have much more in common than that; we just haven’t had the opportunity to explore our other interests, philosophies, feelings and views. This venue is all about being T, and we have clicked on many levels, and about things that are pretty close to our cores. That’s a deeper connection than I have with certain people I have known for years.
Shirley Corning
Well thank you Janie. That’s good to hear and your quite right. I suspect if we did a girls night out we’d have a lot of fun. I can’t resist toying with the public so they have fun too and getting the party going full blast. I’m a seasoned veteren at it and can burn a hole in the dance floor. Something more casual would be nice too. Ah well, dreaming again.
cdjanie
I want to thank everyone who has participated in the lively discussion on this post. However, I think now that everybody has had their say, a breather is in order. So, I am closing the comments.