Feb
06
It seemed to me an awfully big deal to finally see the possibility of expressing my feminine gender identity as a man rather than as a woman. (See Trying on the Yaoi Gender Mix for Size and A New Take on My Male Gender Identity for more.)
I have expressed concerns about the latter, feeling to some degree, inauthentic, or put on. And, I have expressed the opinion that as long as I stay on the male side of the coin, the degree of my femininity is merely a question of fashion and therefore not subject to the same kinds of reactions and objections as gender questions might be.
Well, I didn’t get very far along this yaoi road before reality – at least my reality – stepped squarely in my path.
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Jun
27
In my last post, I described how the shroud of secrecy surrounding our separate female lives can work to our advantage as well as how it might mislead us as to its potential.
Let me take a moment to comment on one negative aspect of our secret lives.
Having a separate persona with no family or past or whatever, is great for protecting the emerging t-girl as she finds her legs, so to speak.
However, it turns her into a paper doll – a two-dimensional person.
No one can really get to know someone who doesn’t really exist.
Read More»May
25
Coming down off the high that is my reunion with the great women of Wildside, I have to remind myself of what real life is about. There is at least a bit of a tendency to think, “Ahhh, that’s the good life; that’s what being a tgirl is all about!”
But, it’s not.
As much as the friendships and good times are the stuff of which a great life is made, the experiences of that week are far too intense and short-lived to be able to extrapolate much from them.
Burning It Up
Wildside burns like a meteor, which – as everyone knows – soon crashes to the ground. We all put our party-selves into high gear and rock Vegas for a week, but by the end of it, even the most hearty of our number – and perhaps, especially they – have run out of gas and need a week to recuperate.
Read More»May
22
The women of Wildside are near and dear to my heart. Herewith a few photos of me and my friends:
These women are more than just pretty faces and sexy bodies; they are truly special people.
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May
17
Thinking back on my just ended Vegas vacation with the Wildside girls, I always marvel at how easy it is for me to meet and connect with people there. It is all the more surprising because I have a terrible time of it in my regular life.
I think we all know that past a certain age, it is difficult to make friends; people are set in their ways, have their guard up and often simply just have enough people to deal with in their lives.
But, I have noticed that t-girls are different – at least the ones I have met at Wildside and even at other t-get-togethers.
The explanation is fairly straightforward.
Read More»Jan
10
Tuesdays are now T-Girl Tuesdays at a bar I have been frequenting for the past few years.
They have always been accepting of me, even when I was the only one of my kind in the bar, but now they have gone further and dedicated a night to us gurls – with a great response from the community.
Did it have anything to do with my presence there for the past few years? I don’t know. But, it is true that the crowd there has also been more than receptive of me, so maybe they realized it was a possibility.
Still, I suspect rather that the main driver was the fact that there were some “sympathetic” souls in management, if you know what I mean.
Read More»Nov
01
I gave the issues I last wrote about some more thought, and have a few ideas to share.
For me, being female is a joyous and intense state. I am sociable, flirty and “on.” Being a guy is more of a contented and relaxed, comfortable thing. Appropriate adjectives include strong, aware, capable.
Being Janie is still quite stressful for me – not so much about being discovered, or worrying about danger any more, but more about doing things that are outside my comfort zone.
I still have so much to remember to do (and not do) when being a woman, from voice to manner to posture – things that are not yet completely innate to me.
And then, socializing is not something that comes easily to me. Though I have revelled in the friendships and interactions that I have achieved as Janie, meeting people has never been without stress for me.
Read More»May
01
As much as I enjoyed my first Viva Wildside Sin City Soiree, this one blows that experience a mile out of the water!
I am a bit shy, and it takes a bit for me to open up to people. Last year, I met a bunch of strangers who turned into sweet friends. This year, I walked into a room of friends and left with real and much deeper connections.
I imagine this experience just gets better – richer – every year…
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Sep
29
Friday at Southern Comfort was a crowded scene. I’d been there a few days and by then, the sight of a massive group of t-girls seems more normal than not…
I spent a while at Starbucks, finding out how far behind in my emails I had fallen and trying to write up some of my experiences.
I was hoping to get some exercise and some shopping in, but no dice. To be honest, I just didn’t get up any desire to shop. Maybe it was sensory overload, I don’t know, but the urge just wasn’t there.
On some level, I am so overwhelmed that I don’t know what I feel. I haven’t been able to catch my breath. There are about 800 attendees at Southern Comfort, and meeting everyone is a large part of the event.
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Jun
01
I have been back from Wildside and Las Vegas for two weeks now, and somehow haven’t managed a report on the fabulous week I spent there.
I didn’t really know what to expect when I finally met up with these Wildside gals. The main reason I chose this group is that they seemed a lot more fun and raunchy than the other. As much as I desired to let my hair down and have a good time – rather than just a nice, proper and evolved time – I worried that I might be too tame for this crowd. How wild and crazy were they? How far would they go? How far would I go? There is only so much you can tell from online interaction, right?
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