“In the beginning, I think just like pretty much every cross-dresser/T-girl I’ve talked to, it’s kind of like you become an adolescent, sex-crazed teenage girl. You dress like a slut. You wear the shortest skirts, the highest heels, and then you start – some of us – start to focus in on the essence of femininity rather than sexuality, and you kind of mature a little bit.” – Claire Black (Janie)
I think most of us – at the gender dysphoric end of the spectrum – start off with a vision of who the ideal woman is – and we try very badly to copy and mirror that. Often ‘the ideal’ is a sexy and glamourous caricature. Then we gradually discover our own female identity and persona and our clothes and style start to reflect how we see ourselves.
Fiona, thanks so much for this comment. I know it may be difficult to understand, but though I have gone over similar thoughts a hundred times, the way you have worded it sent my thought process down an adjacent, but different road – and one that shows a lot more promise than the one I was stuck on before. Oh, I want to give you such a big hug right now!!
My thoughts. I once read “we dress to be the woman we will never have”. May be true, I do not know.
As for me, the first time I dressed as a woman I looked like a man wearing the wrong things. So as you said, I went big and bad, big hair, big heels, tight dresses, etc.. It was fun and I got lots of compliments. I must admit I was totally blown away by all the choices of hair, makeup, clothes, bling, shoes, colors, styles. I had a wonderful, expensive, time learning. As I toned it down men would tell me “God, I wish my wife/girlfriend would dress like you for me.”.
Then one day a guy commented on one of my Flickr pictures that I reminded him a of a “sexy aunt”. Mature but still very feminine. That’s when “Aunt Trish” was born. I am very comfortable with the look. It fits my age and it works for me. I can still slip into a mini dress for special times, the big heels are history, so is the red lipstick.
T.D.
You do have it good, Trish. You have found the right look, and the right men. Most of us can just look on with envy. We all want to be appreciated for what we truly are.
Fiona Alexis
I think most of us – at the gender dysphoric end of the spectrum – start off with a vision of who the ideal woman is – and we try very badly to copy and mirror that. Often ‘the ideal’ is a sexy and glamourous caricature. Then we gradually discover our own female identity and persona and our clothes and style start to reflect how we see ourselves.
cdjanie
Fiona, thanks so much for this comment. I know it may be difficult to understand, but though I have gone over similar thoughts a hundred times, the way you have worded it sent my thought process down an adjacent, but different road – and one that shows a lot more promise than the one I was stuck on before. Oh, I want to give you such a big hug right now!!
trish1700
My thoughts. I once read “we dress to be the woman we will never have”. May be true, I do not know.
As for me, the first time I dressed as a woman I looked like a man wearing the wrong things. So as you said, I went big and bad, big hair, big heels, tight dresses, etc.. It was fun and I got lots of compliments. I must admit I was totally blown away by all the choices of hair, makeup, clothes, bling, shoes, colors, styles. I had a wonderful, expensive, time learning. As I toned it down men would tell me “God, I wish my wife/girlfriend would dress like you for me.”.
Then one day a guy commented on one of my Flickr pictures that I reminded him a of a “sexy aunt”. Mature but still very feminine. That’s when “Aunt Trish” was born. I am very comfortable with the look. It fits my age and it works for me. I can still slip into a mini dress for special times, the big heels are history, so is the red lipstick.
T.D.
cdjanie
You do have it good, Trish. You have found the right look, and the right men. Most of us can just look on with envy. We all want to be appreciated for what we truly are.