gender identity distinction

Gender Identity Distinction – Theory Meets Reality

As much as theoretically I saw a helpful gender identity distinction at the boundary-line between male and female, I have found the distinction difficult to sustain on the ground.

For me to behave in a feminine manner, I have to channel a distinctly female energy within myself. I am not able to become a feminine man other than by seeing the world from as female a perspective as I can muster, and then stepping back over the line by filtering out certain clothes.

But, why filter out those clothes? Is it that they don’t appeal to me? Of course not.

I have struggled with the potential duplicity of being a man dressed as a woman. (See here.) But, I’d suggest that it is no less false to be a female spirit dressed as a man.

Let’s be honest; my male spirit doesn’t do “feminine.” Never has.

There is something to be inferred from the fact that the only kind of guy that I can accept as feminine is one who is basically female in every way except his clothing and chromosomes. On the one hand, that made me feel like at least I wasn’t pretending to be female; but on the other, what difference do the clothes make? I was female no matter what I called myself.

I know there is some incoherence in my thoughts on this matter. Fact is, I am beating the ideas around, kneading them like a stiff dough, pounding them every which way.

But it all hasn’t quite come together yet…